How Did I End Up Here?

I was browsing to find summer slippers and...

I clicked on a few websites to find comfy slippers, but, don't ask me how, I ended up looking at badly translated signs and funny bumper stickers. No, I didn't find slippers, but, do you know how painful it is when you try not to laugh with coffee in your mouth but you can't hold it back and coffee comes out of your nose when you burst out laughing? Yeah, it is painful!
So, have a good laugh, but drink your coffee after you're done laughing!

Hm... a meat lover perhaps?

Okay, got it, it was easy. Don't step on the grass.

Thanks for the advice, I'll just slip into the water very carefully.

A bit too much for fish crap, even when it's fresh. Don't you think?

So, I assume the translator doesn't know a word in English.

Wonder how to "mang out". I usually wipe or use the bidet.

Yeah, I got that. If you want to live, don't jump over the rail.

The prime example of why we must use comma.

The cleverest sign I've ever seen!

Um... I wonder what for?

Time to change some bulbs.

Oh, good! Thanks for clearing that up. I started to wonder...

Haha! Yes, I did read the first line wrong.

If every car would say that, there would be no accidents.

Gotcha! Let me slow down a little.

Knowing people's rebellious nature, most would only read the first line and...

Hey, while you're here, click on a few pages. You might like some of my fiction, short story, or children's books.
I write what I like to read and according to most readers my stories a good, but the truth is:
My books may never reach the bestseller status because I don't have the money to spend on advertising and marketing.
You could make me very happy by reading my stories and leave a few words review. If you like my books, tell your friends about them and ask your local library to order them.
Thanks a million!